Saturday, January 2, 2010

SOMETIMES I WONDER WHY PEOPLE CANNOT SEE THEMSELVES - DO YOU?

Dream your pictures, paint your dreams. Don't let life get you down. Stay strong & rise above your circumstances. Each storm will pass you by and a new dawn will come

SOME PEOPLE SIMPLY CANNOT SEE.....
Try as I may, I have often had encounters with people who simply cannot see themselves! It is amazing - everything seems so clear and yet despite whatever is pointed out and said, such people simply cannot see themselves!

1...THE IRRITANTS
There are the "Irritants" who will just talk and talk and usually it is about themselves and their problems. They will not only talk but they will impose on you too. They simply don't realize that they are imposing and are causing you discomfort and ill-will and so they go on...... Sad really because such people will go through their lives unchanged. I know a few like that and I do my best to avoid them. They will talk about themselves, they will ask you questions, they will show you deep concern, they will offer to help you but they will irritate you even more..... There is this guy who will come up to me and say, "Are you sick today? You look a little bit purple around your eyes...." Another day he will come up and say, "I think you are tired, why don't you rest more?" (when actually I am feeling on top of the world). You feel like strangling them because they darken your bright day. I had someone like that working for me once and I was ecstatic when she decided to leave me. On the day she left, she was still worried if I will be fine without her....?

2...THE NEGATIVES
Then there are the "Negatives" who cannot help seeing the "down" side in every situation. Before something happens, they are already expecting the worst. Whatever you say or do to allay their fears amounts to little. They have already got preconceived notions of what will happen and they are so sure that they cannot ever have it right. And they are right - most of the time. I have a couple of friends who think that it will rain even when the sun is shining brightly. Ask them to climb a mountain and they will tell you they will probably fall and break a leg. Ask them to go out for a picnic and they see accidents happening. Such people are scared of their own shadows but how do you tell them they have a problem. They will think you are the plague waiting to infect them.

3...THE SUPER-CONFIDENTS
Then there are the "Super-confidents" who think they are the most capable and talented people around. Just because they are a little talented, they see everyone else as inferior to them in their area of specialty. They brag and they think they are infallible. They have have got an ill-conceived notion of how good they really are. They are actually quite bad but do they know it? They don't and they will forget about their defeats remembering only the times when they did well. I have this friend who thinks he is a wonderful speaker. he thinks that he has not risen in the speaking circuit because everyone is jealous of him and are trying to keep him down. If only he is given a chance, he is 100% sure he will speak better than many of these old 'foggies' who monopolize the speaking circuit. Will he ever see the real picture? Probably not!

4...THE SUPER-MOTIVATED
Then there are the "Super-motivated". They have attended a Power Motivation program given by a world-famous speaker and they think they have discovered the secret to their own great success. They believe they can walk on fire and tread on water. They think that if they "will" their desire to come to past, it will happen. So they will and will and will and they will keep on 'willing' the rest of their lives. Don't try to tell them otherwise. I have this friend who after attending a talk by a Super Motivator from USA thinks he is the next big thing to happen. He thinks that in every area of his life, he can excel by having this 'super' mind. Try to play badminton with him and he thinks he can beat you even though he plays like an old 'fart'. Beat him once and he thinks he will learn enough to beat you the next time. Don't talk to him too much about spending time on the practice court to learn and practice. He doesn't need it because he thinks the winning mind-set is enough. Such people pay huge sums of money getting top experts to tell them what they want to hear - that they can succeed big in a short while with the transformed mind-set. This is the biggest "sham" of all. They continue to live on in their own world (after all they have paid so much and should be able to get at least some of their money's worth. Don't you think even a 10 year old child is smarter..... 

5...THE "THIS-IS-MY-WORLD-AND-SO-WHAT-IF-YOU-THINK-OTHERWISE" TYPE
Then there are the "This-is-my-world-and-so-what-if-you-think-otherwise" type. They are sure they know what they are doing. They are the ones going to heaven while everyone else suffers the danger of being left behind. Their pride keeps them on - they think they are making so much progress when everyone else can see that they are actually walking around in circles. Do they learn much? Only in the one singular pursuit that they have. Everything else is "no go". Just don't tell them they are wrong. They will villify you! The best thing is to let them be......There are many of these people around and they are closer to you than you think. Even some in your family may be like this but you cannot tell them because it will create the 'perfect' storm. If I can come closer to the truth, some of your spouses may just be in this category. If you have someone like this, you better turn to God for respite and consolation. At least, he will help you keep your big mouth shut.  If you have someone like that and you cannot get rid of that someone, you need to have a solution. Find things to do - go climb mountains and learn new things. It may be a bigger blessing than you expect. I have a friend who told me that once Menopause is reached, you can no longer have sex. No matter what is said, she holds fast to this view. Then you wonder why her husband is improving his looks so much and continuing to pursue 'young' activities. You figure it out! 

DON'T TELL THEM - YOU ARE NOT LIKE THEM....... OR ARE YOU?
Anyway you see it, these people are blind and they will remain blind to their capabilities and their limitations. Until they see themselves, they will not be able to see the real world. Just don't tell them that they have a fault and a weakness. You will only become their enemy because you have stepped on their 'sacred' ground. Instead humor them - say a few nice words and make sure you get out of range before you heave your sigh of relief. Then you be thankful that you are so sure your are NOT LIKE THEM. OR ARE YOU? (You may be, because you have just thought like them). It may be like them, that you are not aware of it because the most common comment of people in the 5 categories above is, "Thank God I am not like them...!"

CAN THEY CHANGE - I AM SURE THEY CAN...... OR AM I?
Can they change?? Can you change??? Yes, change can happen. Ask them to come and see me. I believe I can change almost anyone (my wife excepted). But if I say this, am I not like them a bit too? You think through this. Have fun......